Filling the VOID

Today’s Quote:

“Take your job seriously, and then you’ll be hired to do the fun stuff!” – Auditioning and Acting for the Camera by John W.Shepard

This week’s dreams:

I dreamed most about perpetual motion this week.  Starting last Sunday, I was working almost from wake-up to bed time on my craft.  I had tech rehearsals for a show that opened three days ago, “Six Degrees of Separation.”  Meanwhile, I had kid shows during the day.  I was having drinks after our opening night on Friday with some people who saw the play I was in and one of them asked me what else I did for a living.  With out an instance of hesitation, I said, “I’m a full time actor.”  That is a big thought change for me:  To un-questioningly affirm myself as a full time actor is awesome!  This week, I dreamed about keeping that affirmation going.

What did I “DO” this week?

I started re-submitting to talent agencies in Denver.  I’ve heard enough of some actors saying they can’t get any work from their agent while other actors say they are getting plenty of work to know that if I had an agent, I would do very well!  The result?  I’ve got an audition this week for the (arguably) biggest and best talent agency in Denver!  I started my month of using public transportation instead of my car and I love it.  I’m getting a lot of acting reading done on the bus and have a better handle on my schedule and how to effectively use my time.  It was a very good week.

So…As I prepare for the possibility of being represented by a talent agency, I’ve started grabbing hold of the fact that the majority of equitable work in the area is in commercials. 

I’ve noticed that commercials can have a bad rep with actors who are focused too heavily on “the art” of our work.  However, I’ve long accepted that I am going to have to do things that are more about the money than the art.

Lets play would you rather:

Would you rather do commercials and feel your artistic soul be challenged while working on your craft in thee commercial.  Then also be able to do shows and films that are the ‘good’ work a little later…

OR

Would you rather work as a temp and get a job as an envelope stuffer at a Blockbuster distribution center, act in shows that are artsy, but don’t pay well (or at all) and be so tired and sore and drained from your day job that you can barely focus on stage?

I did the second option…for about three weeks.  I HATED IT!!!  And that second option sucks so much, I will never believe the work of commercials or industrials are beneath me.   At the end of the day, it is still acting…Warehouse jobs, waiting tables, and making lattes isn’t. 

I’m not saying these above jobs are bad jobs.  They just aren’t the jobs to have if you want to have a conversation with a stranger and say, “I’m a full time actor.”  Which, believe me, is one of the most enjoyable things I have ever been privileged enough to say.

I think what I really learned from this week is that there is (regardless of your life purpose as you see it) enormous value in being totally comfortable with your identity to the point that your job, your actions, and your words all radiate that awesome identity.

Tough Guy Huh!?!

Today’s Quote:

“Work that you loathe will taint your entire being.” – Mari Lyn Henry & Lynne Rogers in How To Be A Working Actor

This week’s dream:

Well, this past week being Valentine’s Week, I found myself thinking mostly about my girlfriend.  We are in a long distance relationship and have been since the beginning.  I’ve been dreaming of the day that I can make it no-longer long distance.  The day where I’m successful enough to allow us to actually be part of each other’s daily lives.  (Awe!)

What did I “DO” this week?

This week, I submitted a video audition for a role in a feature film to be shot this summer.  (Thanks to my brother for reading the other parts, and Matt for donating time and a camera) 

I have a theory about success with an agent that I’ve developed over the past few weeks after talking to several individuals.  The theory is:  Aside from having the right look (which might not matter as much as you think) one’s success with good agency is directly connected with one’s work ethic and how effectively someone uses their talent. 

I was talking with a professional in town who has done several commercial spots over the years in the Denver area.  He works more than most, but less than he could.  Something that stood out to me from what he said is that Denver actors in particular, have this sense that they can go into an audition or even the shoot and wing it.  Some, no doubt, get away with it; but most don’t.  Agents hate this! 

What I deduced from this is that: even if there are twenty guys working with the best agency in town that look exactly like me, maybe three or five of them get regular calls.  Why is this?  Those three to five actors are the ones who show up to work like professionals.  They are easy to work with, prepared, professional, and they deliver…every time.  What are the other guys doing?  (This may be harsh—especially since I’m a friend with some of them)  They are probably not doing the above things and they are probably griping at home or in the dressing room about how little work there is, how hard the Denver market is, and how they hate that they look like twenty other guys at their agency.

I think, in the acting world, there is no such thing as an, ‘easy market’.   Some markets have more work than others.  Some are more saturated with actors.  Some have the more desirable work of film and television, while others have better options in commercial and industrial videos.  Every market is hard as hell though!  So, what do I need to do? 

I need to be as tough as my market.  If there are twenty guys in my agency who look like me:  I need to be a better actor, a better professional, and a better person to work with than any of them.  (Not in a snooty competitive way—in a mater of fact way)

In the ‘business’ world of the normal people jobs: People move quickly up the ladder by putting in the extra work, being the best player, and talking to the right people.  Why do we actors think our job should be different?  If you’re in a show that has eight performances a week, are you going to be working hard?  You bet!  Is that enough if you want to keep moving up or be more stable financially?  HELLZZZ NO!!! 

Maybe I need to pull a few more eighty-hour workweeks for the next few years.  Then, when I’m drinking hot cocoa with Johnny Depp at a skiing lodge in Austria, then I can finally sit back and whine about the one time a director didn’t hire me because I didn’t quite look right for the part.

I wonder what Johnny Depp’s favorite hot-drink is.  Does he like it spiked, or not?  Something creamy or some kind of tea?  I guess I’ll have to ask him in a few years when we go on a buddy-buddy ski trip.  Does he ski?  If not, I can teach people how to ski…I’ll teach him…(The thought of seeing him ‘yard-sale’ on the side of a hill and laughing my head off as I help him dig snow out of his goggles makes me really hope he doesn’t ski much)  Johnny, I invite you to a skiing trip in Austria…chance of a lifetime for you buddy!  IT’S  AUSTRIA!!!  That’s some James Bond shit right there!

Vanity In the Eyes of The Mirror

This is a long one.  If you really think you can't spare 5 minutes for inspiration, skip to the last two paragraphs.

Today’s quote:

“To Eric, with the heartbreak look!”  - Deryn Warren - Author of, How to Make Your Audience Fall in Love With You—This was the signature she wrote on the inside cover of the afore-mentioned book.  She signed it after a workshop I did with her a few years ago.  No, I don’t spell my name with a “C”, but I don’t think I felt comfortable correcting her.

Today’s Song:  Sexy Boy by AIR

Dreams:  Being able to invite my most loved friends from college to a ski trip and make sure they can come, even if money is tight for them.  I really want to hang out with people outside of shows again!

What did I  “DO” this week?

I started rehearsals for my biggest gig to date…until I land the next big one.  Not in an arrogant way.  Just in an optimistic way.  I had a big audition for the Colorado Shakespeare Festival.  It was big for me because I’ve had almost no Shakespeare training and I felt really good about how I did in the audition even though I didn’t get called back.

Something I don’t get is how an awkward, smelly, nerdy teenager can grow up in the course of a year or so to have a “Heart Break Look.”  What’s more is that I had recently started wishing I were LESS of a heartbreaker.  (There are probably a few incredibly beautiful people that I have been in love with who also wish I was less of a heartbreaker…Sorry) 

The reason I wished I didn’t look like I do is encapsulated in the fact that the industry of film and stage is saturated with dudes that have “The heartbreak look.”  I recently heard about someone who is in casting who was told they should talk to me.  When I was pointed out from across the room the remark was something like, “Oh, of course he’s an actor.” 

I don’t think many actors are vain; not the good ones anyway.  I think our job security just relies on us looking a particular way.  But, I think the thing that we sometimes forget is that the ‘look’ that will work best for us is the one we already have.  And that ‘look’ is allowed to change as we mature and age and whatnot.  This isn’t to say that I wont be ‘hitting the gym’ in order to fit my role in my March show.  That extra work to have a more distinct body type has so little to do with wanting to look really good, and so much to do with dedication to my work:  Giving it by best effort. 

Along the same lines, I’ve wondered if it’s “Ok” to want to go big with this job.  To go to the Golden Globes (Which I just watched for the first time. tonight) is something that I’ve wanted for a little while now, but I’ve felt that I should be hush hush about it. 

I think my new thought about it is this.  I don’t actually care if I ever get to sit in that room for the Golden Globes or for the Oscars, as long as I know that I did absolutely everything in my power to get there.  I think I have that potential, but I’ll only find out if I try.

I’ve been reflecting recently on the great depression…I have no idea why.  (That was a joke)  I was noticing how much innovation in industry AND art there was during those times.  Those who came through those times on top, were largely people who dreamed big and tried hard to get those dreams.  Starting in the 50s though, after the depression, people were rewarded for getting a job and showing up to work from 9 to 5 and calling that good.  Now, I think the times are changing to that previous trend.

Today one of my favorite people remarked that this is the year of the artist.  I agree.  We artists have the amazing ability to dream bigger than most; EVEN THOUGH just surviving is harder for us than most.  Artists, true artists are the strongest people out there, and I think this year will award those who refuse to let go of dreaming big and trying hard.  After all, lots of people dream big and lots of people try hard, but few do both.